ALONe... Friends, anybody?

Sunday, March 30, 2008

I've been doing some thinking lately. Most of it is about my life...

As I gazed around my surroundings and about the things that has happened to me lately, I realized that out of all this this misery, anger, hatred, punishment, happiness and laughter...there must be a reason for it. Sure enough, I got to know who my real friends are.

It's one of the person who has helped me the most for the past 2-3 months. After finding myself in a rather sticky situation after the night of 25th December 2007, she's the one who has manage to somewhat put a smile across my face...

Yeah, it sucked to know that you're gonna be kicked out of a department and transferred to another one which I hardly knows. And it gets worst when you met with an accident not long after that. Imagine all the things that I need to do...the summons, insurance, monthly installment bla bla bla......

But, somehow her presence and the time spent together with her has helped me a lot. You know who you are and I'm proud to call you my friend. Hey, I have to admit that...I fell for her. I kept wishing that if this is a dream, please don't let me wake up...

She knows how and what I feel for her, and she respect it... I, too respect her for not being able to share what I feel due to some circumstances. But we still manage to be the best of friends.

Somehow, somewhere inside of me......that light of hope will never burn out...and I'll wait...

While I breath, I hope...

Feels like I'm fading away

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Life it seems, will fade away
Drifting further everyday
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters no one else

I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free

Things not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me
Deathly lost this can't be real
I cannot stand this hell I feel

Emptiness is filling me
To the point of agony
Growing darkness taking dawn
I was me, but now he's gone

No one but me can save myself, but it's too late
Now I can think, think why I should even try
Yesterday seems as though it never existed
Death greets me warm, now I will just say goodbye

Kudos to Metallica for a great lyrics(that somehow is reflecting how i feel, somewhere inside me).

Have you ever got a chance to step back and take look at your own life? Of the things that happened either lately or for the past 1 - 2 years.

What has happened to me for the past 3-4 months has thought me a lot about the purity of a thing called 'FRIeNDSHIP'. When I quit my job nearly 2 months ago, half of my world comes crashing down(it's not like the other half of my world is fully rebuilt - and that makes it harder). I was broke, got nuthing to do(obviously...duh!) and the best part, not everybody knows about it...well, almost...

I only told a few people about it. Even my mom got to know it about 2-3 weeks ago...... Imagine the lies that I have to create just not to make them suspicious about why am I on the 'night shift' for 2 weeks... Hahaha...that was quite fun actually... :)

1st DaY oF >-DeATH-o-SPHeRe-<

Friday, March 28, 2008

Welcome...I guess...

It's the first official day of the blog.
I'm typing this while in ACE (Accent and Conversational English) Training, which is not what I'm suppose to do (and its suppose to make my English better than a sort of a neutral English accent. Yup, that includes grammar, pronounciation, making complete sentences, spelling bla bla bla.... WHUTEVER) ...but then again, I'm not the type of guy that follow every single FReAKIN' rules there is in the world...

Can't find a topic to write about for the time being...but I do have so many thing inside of my brain right now. Most of it is about life, which is kind of going a lil' bit OK for the time being. Imagine nearly 2 months of doing absolutely NUTHING!!! NUTHING' is bad...very bad....

I'll post another one soon as I get a chance to. (and a topic to go with it!)